Guard. I was once washed with a hose before. I took part of a revolution!
The president refused to give up his post when the other one was already
elected by the people. So we went out to the streets to protest. Me and
my friend stood in the middle of a large crowd, by hugging two statues in the
middle of the street and pissing in between their legs and screaming when
the police appeared and ran toward us. We ran away in the crowd, but
more police arrived from all directions. They looked like fishermen, with
cigarettes hanging in their mouths. They were real fishermen. They were.
They brought their fishing nets. They began throwing them toward the crowd,
and the people were captured and panicking. The fishermen pulled in their
catch and dumped the protesters into a truck. At one moment there were
fishermen everywhere and nets were coming in from every direction and we
were caught, and taken to the police station. They were shining lamps on us,
our heads were beaten with police sticks and our blood was later hosed
down as we were laying in the shower room half conscious. Then declared
waste, we were released back into the streets.

The guard didn't say a word, he escorted me to a room, where a nurse was
typing on a typewriter, while a man was walking up and down the room as
he was was dictating a letter to her. As I was sitting in the room I noticed that
the nurse had a cold and she was wiping her nose into her shoulder while typing.
Meanwhile the guard was standing next to me and his stomach was making
growling noises.