I've made five orders from Clarity.it over recent years and their
deliveries are always lamentably slow and this time I emailed an enquiry
about the delay.

"I know from several previous orders that speed of delivery is not your
strong point, but it would be appreciated if this one could be shipped
no later than tomorrow as it is required for a job this coming weekend."

It was ignored and their proud boast on their web site is that they
don't allow telephone enquiries as email is so much more efficient. The
enquiry was ignored too so a couple of days later I sent a mild
rebuke...

"If you don't offer customers the courtesy of telephone communication
you should at least provide a swift email response. Your attitude to
customers is nothing short of disgraceful."

This brought forth a presumably drunken tirade which may amuse you. I'm
hoping it will amuse the Trading Standards people at clarity's local
authority too.

Enjoy.

Are you bloody kidding? I can't believe the cheek of this!

Let me get this straight. You mailed to tell us, not ASK, that you
wanted
your stuff fast.

Well that's great, thanks for telling us you'd appreciate your stuff
fast -
I dare say that's actually kind of an assumed default for everybody who
joins the queue though, so well done there for taking the time to write
and
tell us what's pretty much the prevailing customer desire. And ours too.
I
mean, do you think we're sitting around drinking coffee all day? That by
telling us you'd like it quick that some factor can be changed to alter
the
physics of time needed to pack and ship everybody?

I noticed the absence of a question mark in your mail, thus no reply was
called for.

Jovial nicety mail to say "thank you for telling us that, take your
place in
the queue like everyone else" or as it would have been, "ok, I've pulled
a
string and shunted you up the queue" is currently unavaiable because it
woul
djust take up time which is needed, without dilution, to help with
packing
and shipping right now. I'm the only one who's checking for e-mails at
the
moment, and to be blunt sometimes it's just not as important as getting
people's gear out to them.

And your litttle quip about no telephone service = fast email response.
WELL TRY ASKING A BLOODY QUESTION THEN.

So because nobody mailed back to say "yes SIR, let's get you jumped up
that
queue there" we now have disgraceful customer service? Disgraceful? How
dare you. It's not often I let something get to me but I am actually
bloody
furious with this.

But you know what? Here's the horrible irony. Despite being totally
snowed
under, and note here's me working e-mails at THIS hour as a little
evidence
of how heavy it is, I did actually alter physics and cheated for you. I
felt helpful when I read it and said "what the heck, nobody will know"
so I
jumped you up the queue for despatch tomorrow. But look what happens.
You
do your bit. You do your best for some people. But they turn out to just
be impatient twitchy gits who expect hoops jumped through and rant and
rave
unless their butts are kissed. Well not with Clarity. I haven't kissed a
butt since I wasted my time in retail, and I never will again. I won;t
miss
the business because I don't want the bother and stress that comes with
it
for me or my people.

To be honest I'd like to terminate and refund this order and wave you on
your way. I never have and never will tolerate nonsense from anyone who
wants to trade with Clarity. My finger's been hovering over the
Terminate
button for the last ten minutes, but it occurs to me that if I did I
might
knacker your weekend cabling plans - and despite my fury I'm not going
to be
nasty just for the hell of it. As it stands it'll go out around noon
tomorrow unless told otherwise by then, but you please feel free to
cancel
it and I'll run that refund personally.

Also, to be teeth-grittingly helpful, if you want it sent Special
Delivery
for an 80% chance of saturday delivery, state so and that we can add £3
to
your payment card.

There's MY rant. Hope you liked it. Disgraceful indeed.

Bye bye.

John Doyle
Director & Operations
Clarity

Malcolm Knight wrote:

And by coincidence we placed an order with them recently - which has
still not arrived and no notification of any possible dates. I was
actually going to email them today but under the circumstances I will
let them work on your order first today - I only need my stuff for next
Wednesday :-)

Let's hope the staff are not too under the weather and get your order
and mine out correctly - eventually.

I think we had decided not to use them again anyway - despite your
posting. All previous orders have taken a long time to arrive!

Malcolm Knight wrote:
That's not an enquiry. That's a statement. As far as I can see,
everything John said is accurate and to-the-point.

Perhaps some remedial English classes to help you differentiate between
a statement and a question would be in order? (hint - that was a
question, albeit a rhetorical one)

--
Gareth Halfacree
http://gareth.halfacree.co.uk

Malcolm Knight wrote:

Did you remember the terms & conditions on their website
(http://www.clarity.it/terms.htm) - which include this:-

"Humour
We also write our site in a light-hearted and hopefully entertaining
way. Anyone choosing to do business with us is expected to appreciate
occasional sarcasm, irony, and outright world-class wit. People with No
Sense Of Humour should therefore not trade with us in case they fail to
understand our wording, or take humorous writings seriously. This is how
we choose to work and live, so either accept and support that or don't
do business with us. Smiling and laughter helps keep you young, and
extends your life. We can't back that up with paperwork, but we think
it's true."

Perhaps they have invoked this clause in your case?

And also regarding delivery:-

"Delivery

Time
We aim to have your goodies sent within two working days of your order
date at most. We usually manage that, indeed most often it's sent out
same or next day. However, it's important that you understand that we
are NOT a fully manned and equipped mail order box-shifting warehouse,
and that processing, packing, and shipping of orders can and does vary
depending on available manpower, and surges in order volumes. Please
therefore allow up to 5 WORKING days for despatch. If for any reason
it's likely to take any longer, we should be aware well in advance of
that timescale and be able to advise you and check that you still wish
to keep your order active."

Gareth Halfacree wrote:

We would take it as an enquiry which required a reply - at least in my
firm we read a little deeper.

"Gareth Halfacree" <usenet@halfacree.co.uk> wrote in message
news:4omgrsFffsdhU1@individual.net...
Agreed it was a statement, merely a low-key comment about the delay
which Clarity chose to ignore. Their belief that they are at liberty to
break the contract after taking the money has been brought to the
attention of the Trading Standards office so that guidance can be given.
--
Malcolm

In message <4omf35FfdbiqU1@individual.net>, Malcolm Knight
<mk@spam-trap.co.uk> writes
What have Trading Standards got to do with it?

By your own admission you have ordered from Clarity before and you know
they're slow. You still placed your - needed by the weekend - order with
them. You complain (not enquire) twice in a few days and then get a
comprehensive, but also amusing, response from their Director &(of?)
Operations telling you he's bumped you up the queue and suggesting SD is
available to you also. You're then not happy and post to usenet. Sad.

--
dave @ stejonda

In message <4omjhmFfa2beU1@individual.net>, Malcolm Knight
<mk@spam-trap.co.uk> writes
There is also this clause in their T&Cs "We reserve the absolute right
to decline to supply to any individual who we feel does not exhibit a
suitable level of intelligence or attitude. We do not need to explain
why, and this is at the final and total discretion of the management."

--
dave @ stejonda

dave @ stejonda wrote:

If the money has been taken for the order then Clarity have not declined
to supply - and there may indeed be a case for involving Trading Standards.

John Naismith wrote:

What do you think of this in their T&C's:-

"The offers are deemed to become a contract of sale only as and when we
take your payment by whatever method or despatch your goods."

They have already taken payment for my goods - but not yet shipped them.
Do I have a contract of sale with them?

John Naismith wrote:

Yes, because it shows as being raised on date x and cleared on my
statement on date x+2.

Pre-authorised transactions do not appear in the on-line statement for
this particular Mastercard - I have had to call them to get details of
pre-auth such as car hire, hotels and some online vendors.

So I reckon I have a contract with them.

John Naismith wrote:

There is potentially no problem - they may well have shipped the goods
today for all I know. I was going to email them to find out - but the
OP's response from their owner put me off doing that. They have taken
longer than their 5 days - and it states they will advise the customer
if such delays occur. This is not their usual behaviour but they have
always been slower than anyone else we deal with - which is why I tend
to order from them 10 days before we need items.

How exactly did they break the contract?

Peter Crosland

"Malcolm Knight" <mk@spam-trap.co.uk> wrote in message
news:4omf35FfdbiqU1@individual.net...
he proved how right you were.....
An indefensible, inexcusable and totally unprofessional reply to a valid
customer complaint, which fully illustrates the utter contempt this
person/company has for it's customers. Shouldn't be in business (and
probably won't be for much longer at this rate). Disgraceful indeed.

On Fri, 6 Oct 2006 10:20:50 UTC, John Naismith <jts@naismith.org.uk>
wrote:

It's certainly true that they are habitually late with delivery. Worth
noting that they can't be relied upon.

Well....

1) It's not a private email. It's an email sent in the course of
business (even if it's totlally unbusinesslike)

2) Who says an email is private. Snail mail belongs to the receiver, and
so does email. The recipient can do what they like with it; they've
entered into no agreement with the sender.

--
[ 7'ism - a condition by which the sufferer experiences an inability
to give concise answers, express reasoned argument or opinion.
Usually accompanied by silly noises and gestures - incurable, early
euthanasia recommended. ]

John Naismith wrote:

You might like to look at this page (http://www.clarity.it/terms.htm) on
their website and the reference to a certain carrier company in the
Delivery section. Quite unusual for a business to make such a statement
as:-

"We'll never use xxx because of extremely poor performance in the past
including inability to operate accounts correctly and stolen packages.
<ouch!>"

In message <4op5guFfkp1tU1@individual.net>, Colin Forrester
<colin@thefrogslepthere.com> writes

--
dave @ stejonda

In message <45272cae.0@entanet>, Rob <anon@anon.com> writes
See also these comments on their 'about us' page:-

I'm beginning to like this company.

--
dave @ stejonda

Colin Forrester wrote:
It seems xxx haven't improved from when I used to use them, I'm surprised
they're still in business.
--
Adrian

"dave @ stejonda" <nospamdeleteabusedave@stejonda.freeuk.com> wrote in
message newsC$uraD$S2JFFA3M@privacy.net...

Which when interpreted and put in plain english, means 'we are quite happy
to take your money and provide you with this shitty, abysmally slow service
as long as you're prepared to grit your teeth and put up with it without
ever daring to question it. You'll get your goods sometime so like it or
f*** off.'

Yes. I can see the attraction. If only all companies were like that......