A new study by the Bailo Research Conglomerate
shows there are 'no' Linux users ( 0.00% ).

Says Senior Researcher, Idaha McKrafty, "once
we defined 'Linux users' as 12 inch pygmies with
three arms and a stock portfolio valued at
above "e100,000" we found that 0.00% of computer
users, use Linux".

Early on there were some difficulties. Initially,
we became aware of a small community of fifty 12 inch
pygmies with three arms living in the Southwestern
sub-continent of India, all of whom used Linux
on the desktop. They were astute financially,
but not that astute, their portfolios valued at only
e50,000. So we raised the requirement to e100,000".

The Bailo Research Conglomerate study was funded by
Microsoft, Sun, the Gates Foundation, SCO,and Darl
Mc Bride's mom. Bailo Research is willing to conduct
studies for any organization, criminal or not,
so long as they provide funding in small unmarked
bills. The words 'Mafia', 'Cosa Nostra', 'Mob',
'Organized Crime' or 'Sopranos' should never be
mentioned in conjunction with the Bailo Research
Foundation.

--
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